Unique Challenges to Online Dating as a Single Parent
Published on November 29, 2014
Online dating can be challenging at the best of times, but single parents encounter a unique set of extra obstacles. Thankfully, there are smart ways to combat each potential setback, increasing your chances of finding a good match.
1. Time
Life can get hectic as you juggle your parental responsibilities and try to squeeze a few hours of socializing into the week. Meanwhile, it also takes time to set up a good online dating profile, browse through potentially attractive matches and read or respond to messages. It’s easy to get the balance wrong, either forgetting your online dating commitments or temporarily failing to prioritize your family life. One tactic that works well is setting aside a daily block of specific time (say, in the evening after your kids are in bed) for online dating tasks.
2. Suitability
Unfortunately, not everyone is open to dating a single parent, so you might be wondering whether you should wait until someone is interested before you make it known that you have children. However, people who aren’t comfortable with your parental responsibilities aren’t worth your time, and it can be very hurtful to connect with someone only to be rejected when you admit you have children. As a result, it’s best to make it clear that you’re a single parent. If you don’t, you may end up wasting your time on someone who isn’t interested in seeing someone with children, or someone who would otherwise have been keen to meet may feel you seem untrustworthy due to your lack of early disclosure.
3. Presentation
It’s also important to note that some single parents go too far in the other direction, filling their entire profile with information about their children and exclusively discussing their role as a mom or dad. While your family may be very important to you, don’t forget to represent yourself as more than just a single parent! Make sure you write about your hobbies, your passions and your personality traits more than you write about your children. If you fail to give a broad picture, prospective suitors may only get a vague sense of who you are and it may seem that there’s no real room for dating in your life.
4. Introductions
When you ‘audition’ a potential partner through online communication and eventually dates, you’re not just considering whether they fit with you. You’re thinking about whether they will be good to your children and whether it’s too soon to conduct introductions. It’s smart to wait until you know that someone you met through online dating is committed to sticking around before you suggest they meet your kids, as it can be hurtful and confusing to children when partners leave.
5. Feedback
Finally, it’s important to take a balanced look at what your children think. Safety is always important when you’re first getting to know someone from a dating site, but never more so than when your children are also going to be around this new person.
Author: Randy
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