What To Wear On A First Date

Published on December 6, 2009

How should you dress when going on your first date? I suspect most of my readers will be meeting through online dating services so my advice will be based assuming you’ll be meeting for the first time.

How Should A Woman Dress on The First Date?
If I’m honest, I don’t feel that I have much to offer ladies on how to dress specifically. As a guy, I’ve always felt that women are far better with style than men. Assuming a woman is looking for a serious relationship using online dating I would offer one recommendation for your first date: dress conservatively. When looking for a serious relationship, you don’t want a man to date you based on the percentage of skin you show. I imagine there are statistics out there somewhere that will say if you undress a little your odds for a second date will go up. And I’m not against a woman dressing sexy by any means. However, I feel that a relationship based on how much a man likes who you are will have more success in the long run than when the man simply likes how you look. If you’ll be having a first date with someone you have known for some time, I think how you dress in this case should be less of a concern.

How Should A Man Dress On The First Date?
Whether you’ve known her for year or you’re meeting for the very first time, you should always try to look your best. The point here is to show her the respect she deserves; to show that you appreciate that she would spend the evening with you. This might seem like an old fashioned idea but I believe it is the right way to approach your dating.

If that’s not enough inspiration, dressing well will also improve your odds just because, well…you look nice! Many times when people meet using the internet they realize that their date looked much better in their profile pictures than they do in real life. If you can break this mold and actually look better in person, you’re going to stand out. Also, you only get to make one first impression which will be made within the first 10 seconds of meeting. Don’t inadvertently end the relationship before it even begins! How you dress is important.

If you want to dress well but you’re just not sure what you should be wearing, I would recommend asking a female friend to go shopping with you. It would be best that this woman be around the same age as you and one that you feel dresses well. I can attest from personal experience that women will be thrilled to help in this way (my friends were almost too excited). I always found a woman’s advice far better than trying to emulate some model in a magazine. Still, here are some resources if you’re looking to jump start your personal style on your own:

• GQ Style
• Men’s Health Style
• Details Magazine Style Avice
• The Art of Manliness
• 8 Men’s Fashion Mistakes to Avoid

Additionally, some men feel that certain personal hygiene rituals are only done by women or metrosexual (do people still use this word?) men. I don’t think this should be the case when you’re actively dating. Here are some thoughts on proper hygiene. I hope you’re already taking care of these things before your dates…but just in case some out there need a reminder:

• Make sure you have a nice cologne that isn’t overpowering (get your female friend from above to help again if you’re unsure). I’ve seen the Axe Body Spray commercials but those aren’t really all that honest so don’t over-do it! The point is to not smell bad…dumping on a ton of spray is self-defeating. Some scents (or maybe most) use pheromones which are said to help attract the opposite sex as well.
• If you’re pasty white, I would recommend addressing that. I know this isn’t popular with many men but I stand by my recommendation. You don’t have to overdo it…just try to get a little color! Recent studies have suggested tanning beds are really bad for your health so go with spray-on if you can find it.
• If you’re a guy with a uni-brow, it’s time to separate those bad boys.
• Maintain your general hygiene! Before every date always clip those nose hairs (if necessary), clip your finger nails, brush your teeth, and all those other standard things that I hope you’re doing without having to have someone tell you to.
• While dating actively, be more aggressive with getting your haircut. It will look better with additional attention.
• If you sweat when nervous, be aggressive with your deodorant before dates. I know this sounds like common sense but you might be surprised how much you’ll be sweating on some dates. You may want to consider going with an unscented deodorant to not to have too many different scents going on with your cologne.
• If you have acne and for some reason aren’t using an acne treatment, you should start.

Some might ask: “But I never dress nice…isn’t this dishonest?”. I do argue frequently in my online dating guide that you need to be honest. However, I don’t think dressing nice out of respect for your date is being dishonest if you’re really doing it out of respect. I never wear a suit but when I go on a job interview, you better believe that I do. When I have interviewed for promotions at work I have worn suits and never once has the interviewer said “I see you every day and you never wear a suit! You’re a liar!”. They know I don’t dress this nice normally but they also know I’m doing it out of respect for their time. This is why I still think you should dress well even if you’ve know the woman for a long time.

Finally, for any guys out there who think the rules appear stricter for men than women, they’re really not. The majority of women just follow these types of rules without any prompting where guys often need a little direction.

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