Old Problems in New Packaging
Published on September 28, 2007
Every now and again I hear a news story talking about the dangers of internet dating such as this one. Now, without question, there are risks with online dating but, as even the briefest scan of newspapers from the past century would prove, date crimes have existed for a very long time. One might even go so far as to say that they have existed for as long as dating has. Now since I found happiness through online dating (and since I take my time to run a blog like this), I dislike that these stories make the headlines while similar situations in traditional” dating are not worth mentioning. It’s not that I feel that either should be ignored. I just feel that these articles specifically related to online dating may as well be titled: “Jerk learns to use internet”. It’s not the internet that created the problem and, in my mind, its involvement is hardly worth mentioning. The internet has as much to do with these situations as Joe’s bar or Applebee’s does when a similar situation arises from a more traditional scenario. Let me provide an example from the article: near the end there is mention that most online dating sites do not do any screening of members. Most individuals dating online or thinking of internet dating read that and probably get a little worried. However, what if the circumstances were more traditional: would it be strange to see “Most Applebee’s don’t usually do any sort of screening of singles drinking at the bar…”? Just a thought. I’m left to believe that the newness of online dating is what that makes these events more news-worthy than their offline counter-parts.
With all that said, the article still offers great information. I think daters should apply these tips to all dating, not just online dates. Everyone needs to be aware when meeting someone new, online or otherwise! And the better they sound, the more suspicious you should be. Ladies: the closer your potential date sounds to a 10, the more cautious you should be. I haven’t met them all but I believe most guys are some distance from perfect. In the case where he’s good looking, rich and has starred in a few movies, you’ll probably (and I’m only half serious here) want to be so carefule as meeting him on a double date! Too good to be true normally is. Guys: you’re not entirely safe either (although you are a lot safer). While I’ve never heard of female “predators”, there are women who will try to take advantage of you in other ways. If she is expressing a desperate need to get you into the bedroom as soon as you meet (or even before), chances are you not exuding the animal magnetism she wants you to believe you are.
I do find it amusing that the first three sentences in the article have nothing to do with the rest of the story but mention an unrelated woman who had success with online dating. I suppose that’s their way of offering a different view of the internet dating experience.
Good news isn’t often interesting and a story about how someone found success with internet dating isn’t going to sell many papers. Regardless of how unreported they are, there are far more situations where people are finding happiness or even marriage with online dating than there are situations like the one described in this article. Here’s to hoping that everyone takes precautions in all dating scenarios. I hope people can take the advice offered by these news stories without being scared off by them.
Author: Brad
Brad initially struggled with online dating but over time became quite successful using it. He met his wife using online dating and has been giving advice and helping people improve their results since 2007. He has written a Free Online Dating Guide to help others find success with online dating. You can learn more about his personal experience using online dating and running this website here.
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